Slightly Stoopid
Collie Man
http://sarahracecarr.imeem.com/music/18wq_diW/slightly_stoopid_collieman/
Sunday, February 24, 2008
Saturday, February 23, 2008
The Dodo and Us (Part 2)
Before reading this article I would like to warn the reader that many of the views in this article may upset you. They are brutal in there honesty and common sense. Please If you are weak-minded kindly turn the fuck back.
As we have looked at the world around us over time, people in history as well as the present have noticed a great many things of importance. I will not be covering a great many of those things, in fact I will only be discussing one today. Don't worry though constant reader. I have more than enough time to go over the vast majority of those things in the future. I don't plan on going anywhere and the Internet seems to be sticking around, ipso facto so will my blog and my topics that no one reads. Now with the formalities behind us I would like to move on. I would like to discuss a very obvious and critical flaw in human society. Of course the flaw that I am talking about is Natural Selection. I put forth a challenge for anyone who reads this to prove it otherwise. Now I understand that stupid people exist, and just like our modern day portrayal of the Dodo many of these people will fall off the proverbial cliff and die. The problem is that not enough will die in this manner. I'm sure that right now many of you are thinking OMFG what is wrong with this guy, I assure you that other than thinking way too much there is absolutely nothing wrong with me. I'm merely stating the obvious.
Looking at the newspaper for the past some odd years, the majority of headlines have read like an ongoing horror story where everyday some sick bastard adds a chapter to our already fucked up story. My point is, that every day i read the paper there is an article about being short on money for this, or how were missing resources for that. Late last year California was on the verge of a drought, luckily for us Californians that fear has now passed as we were and are presently being pissed on. How long will that last though with our and the world's freakishly increasing population. More importantly and this really is my main point. How do we intend to survive as a species while we sit here defying nature? We defy natural selection on a daily basis and we use vast amount of resources to do it.
In Nature when an animal is born without the necessary equipment such as legs, fingers etc, it dies. When an animal reaches a certain age, or breaks down to a certain point, it dies. If an animal is 100 percent alive and merely runs into another animal that is stronger, it dies. Animals that catch disease or break there legs will more often then not die. Not our species, not anymore. We've become to smart for our own good. Don't get me wrong I'm all for compassion and helping people who need it. I just feel that at our current rate of consumption as far as natural resources are concerned. We are driving ourselves into the ground. When a person is born with missing legs or loss of vision, instead of being killed they are given a placard and state supported medical insurance. When a human reaches a certain age where it's difficult to keep up with modern day going ons they retire and collect social security. If a weak human runs into a stronger human, be it mentally or physically, nothing occurs, we nod peacefully and move on. Also, and we've really screwed ourselves on this one. All the diseases and viruses we have saved ourselves from with "miracle cures" like penicillin and what not, are becoming immune and showing us that natural selection cannot be defeated or overcome at least not until we have completely and utterly mastered technology, and obviously where not quite there yet. Will we go the way of the Dodo for the same reasons(the intervention of ourselves), only time will tell. Wrap that around your brain for awhile and get back at me.
As we have looked at the world around us over time, people in history as well as the present have noticed a great many things of importance. I will not be covering a great many of those things, in fact I will only be discussing one today. Don't worry though constant reader. I have more than enough time to go over the vast majority of those things in the future. I don't plan on going anywhere and the Internet seems to be sticking around, ipso facto so will my blog and my topics that no one reads. Now with the formalities behind us I would like to move on. I would like to discuss a very obvious and critical flaw in human society. Of course the flaw that I am talking about is Natural Selection. I put forth a challenge for anyone who reads this to prove it otherwise. Now I understand that stupid people exist, and just like our modern day portrayal of the Dodo many of these people will fall off the proverbial cliff and die. The problem is that not enough will die in this manner. I'm sure that right now many of you are thinking OMFG what is wrong with this guy, I assure you that other than thinking way too much there is absolutely nothing wrong with me. I'm merely stating the obvious.
Looking at the newspaper for the past some odd years, the majority of headlines have read like an ongoing horror story where everyday some sick bastard adds a chapter to our already fucked up story. My point is, that every day i read the paper there is an article about being short on money for this, or how were missing resources for that. Late last year California was on the verge of a drought, luckily for us Californians that fear has now passed as we were and are presently being pissed on. How long will that last though with our and the world's freakishly increasing population. More importantly and this really is my main point. How do we intend to survive as a species while we sit here defying nature? We defy natural selection on a daily basis and we use vast amount of resources to do it.
In Nature when an animal is born without the necessary equipment such as legs, fingers etc, it dies. When an animal reaches a certain age, or breaks down to a certain point, it dies. If an animal is 100 percent alive and merely runs into another animal that is stronger, it dies. Animals that catch disease or break there legs will more often then not die. Not our species, not anymore. We've become to smart for our own good. Don't get me wrong I'm all for compassion and helping people who need it. I just feel that at our current rate of consumption as far as natural resources are concerned. We are driving ourselves into the ground. When a person is born with missing legs or loss of vision, instead of being killed they are given a placard and state supported medical insurance. When a human reaches a certain age where it's difficult to keep up with modern day going ons they retire and collect social security. If a weak human runs into a stronger human, be it mentally or physically, nothing occurs, we nod peacefully and move on. Also, and we've really screwed ourselves on this one. All the diseases and viruses we have saved ourselves from with "miracle cures" like penicillin and what not, are becoming immune and showing us that natural selection cannot be defeated or overcome at least not until we have completely and utterly mastered technology, and obviously where not quite there yet. Will we go the way of the Dodo for the same reasons(the intervention of ourselves), only time will tell. Wrap that around your brain for awhile and get back at me.
Thursday, February 21, 2008
The Dodo and Us
I'm sure everyone remembers the Dodo. It's been a long time since the little goofball crossed my mind. I guess there is a legitimate reason for that, the Dodo has been extinct since roughly 1693. A flightless and pudgy ball of feathers, the Dodo was a comical looking animal. Enough so for it to become recognized by millions as the first animal killed off by the intervention of humans. I can recall being a kid and wishing I could see the dodo(hell I wanted to see dinosaurs too) in real life. Its easy to forget about things like the Dodo when you have an iPhone, a PS3, and a bitchin car. Lately I've just been realizing that some of the most amazing animals on this planet are on the verge of dying out forever. The largest Ocean going animal as well as the largest land dwelling animal are both on the endangered species list. The Blue Whale and The African Elephant. Creatures Like the Panda and the Aye-Aye will soon cease to exist except in textbooks and museums. It can easily be chalked up as natural selection, when looking for a reason as to the demise of these animals. It only bothers me so much because I realise that it can and will only get worse. With the amount of people on the earth combined with the lack of resources such as land water and food, it is inevitable that more and more species of animal will continue to become extinct, and at a more and more frequent rate. How does natural selection, Darwinism, and extinction tie into the human race? TUNE IN TOMORROW FOLKS FOR THE STUNNING CONCLUSION.
Intricacies of Space Flight
Sitting around looking at my DVD collection I came across something I thought was odd and kinda funny. Back in my heyday when I was like 12 years old, I would always be amazed at the scenes where the spaceships in Sci-Fi movies would come cruising in to land on Earth or wherever. Just this epic scene of ships taking up the view of the sky or landing with flashing seizure lights, Fold down steps(are you kidding me?), and shiny reflector crap. I remember they would always reach our planet in three distinct ways. Either they would swoop down Independence Day style in this slow drawn out 2 day voyage from like the moon to the surface of the earth. When they finally arrived there would always be this little contingency of people waiting to welcome the new beings to earth. "Hi!, I'm like the president and this is uh earth........so yea, Welcome and stuff".
The second way that I remember Alien forms getting to earth is through the good old fashion crash landing. Generally an alien infested meteor or space ship or better yet a pod will come rocketing down to earth in a curtain of bright blue flame that no one sees, crash into an enormous cornfield and leave the alien(or entity) to slip out and seek the nearest human. Once the human is found by the alien they almost always have sex or brutally kill each other, It's just protocol.
The third way, and this is my favorite. It's probably sometime in the not so distant future, we've attempted to colonize and harvest some other planet, or probe the far reaches of space with a crew of like nine specialists(who never end up solving any of the problems they are their for) on some ridiculous mission. Like..........Uh I dunno, finding out what happened to the ship that mysteriously disappeared 4 years ago in the same sector/quadrant. Upon the ships arrival to said location everything goes drastically wrong. "Oh my god what's going on" <---------Always necessary to state the obvious
Anyway what I'm getting at is I can't believe any of that crap anymore. If I am to understand that these aliens are capable of traversing galaxies to arrive on Earth in a ship, I have to believe they have some kind of improved form of transportation. Whether it be the typical "Faster than the speed of light" travel, or folding the space time continuum and creating wormholes to travel wherever you please, I have to think they're doing something different. So then my point is why the fuck do they land on a tripod, I mean a tripod? This thing travelled across universes to land on a fucking tripod? So, what? It just wouldn't land if there was rough terrain or a mountain, or water? I can just picture the alien co-pilots looking at each other
Pilot "So...... you wanna cruise to the surface or...."
Pilot2 " eh I dunno.....I mean it looks a little uneven doesn't it..... it might be a little hard to like...?
Pilot "yea, yea I see what your saying these tripod models are like 23,000 Gelkacs out of date(scratching face) well........you wanna just like keep going till we hit another planet?"
Pilot2 "Lets just do that (engages the clutch and takes off)
I always imagined like this Perpetual motion Anti-matter gyroscope that mulched the very elements around it into a smooth glass-like landing pad that the ship just settled on gently, with all the aliens sliding down to the ground on giant twisty slides. Folding space, to land on the surface of a planet in a flash would be chill, but another question arises from it all. Why are we so fascinated that it must be us that they visit. In space they have estimated that we have as many galaxies as we have grains of sand on the earth. How would they find us in the first place, and If they did why would they waste there time we may as well be rats to a species of beings that advanced, like a planet of parasites. Q: Do I think there is life on other planets in the universe? A: If the galaxy to grains of sand thing holds true than yea, with that many galaxies there is so much possibility for another random alignment of things that could bring about life. Will we ever encounter it? Not a fucking chance. But movies will continue to believe, and I'll continue to laugh.
The second way that I remember Alien forms getting to earth is through the good old fashion crash landing. Generally an alien infested meteor or space ship or better yet a pod will come rocketing down to earth in a curtain of bright blue flame that no one sees, crash into an enormous cornfield and leave the alien(or entity) to slip out and seek the nearest human. Once the human is found by the alien they almost always have sex or brutally kill each other, It's just protocol.
The third way, and this is my favorite. It's probably sometime in the not so distant future, we've attempted to colonize and harvest some other planet, or probe the far reaches of space with a crew of like nine specialists(who never end up solving any of the problems they are their for) on some ridiculous mission. Like..........Uh I dunno, finding out what happened to the ship that mysteriously disappeared 4 years ago in the same sector/quadrant. Upon the ships arrival to said location everything goes drastically wrong. "Oh my god what's going on" <---------Always necessary to state the obvious
Anyway what I'm getting at is I can't believe any of that crap anymore. If I am to understand that these aliens are capable of traversing galaxies to arrive on Earth in a ship, I have to believe they have some kind of improved form of transportation. Whether it be the typical "Faster than the speed of light" travel, or folding the space time continuum and creating wormholes to travel wherever you please, I have to think they're doing something different. So then my point is why the fuck do they land on a tripod, I mean a tripod? This thing travelled across universes to land on a fucking tripod? So, what? It just wouldn't land if there was rough terrain or a mountain, or water? I can just picture the alien co-pilots looking at each other
Pilot "So...... you wanna cruise to the surface or...."
Pilot2 " eh I dunno.....I mean it looks a little uneven doesn't it..... it might be a little hard to like...?
Pilot "yea, yea I see what your saying these tripod models are like 23,000 Gelkacs out of date(scratching face) well........you wanna just like keep going till we hit another planet?"
Pilot2 "Lets just do that (engages the clutch and takes off)
I always imagined like this Perpetual motion Anti-matter gyroscope that mulched the very elements around it into a smooth glass-like landing pad that the ship just settled on gently, with all the aliens sliding down to the ground on giant twisty slides. Folding space, to land on the surface of a planet in a flash would be chill, but another question arises from it all. Why are we so fascinated that it must be us that they visit. In space they have estimated that we have as many galaxies as we have grains of sand on the earth. How would they find us in the first place, and If they did why would they waste there time we may as well be rats to a species of beings that advanced, like a planet of parasites. Q: Do I think there is life on other planets in the universe? A: If the galaxy to grains of sand thing holds true than yea, with that many galaxies there is so much possibility for another random alignment of things that could bring about life. Will we ever encounter it? Not a fucking chance. But movies will continue to believe, and I'll continue to laugh.
Wednesday, February 20, 2008
Presidential Fallacies
Everyday now I turn on the TV(which can be a problem itself), and everyday I see the same thing. I see three people vying for the most important job in America. Now that isn't my problem, my problem is that it's too reminiscient of my days in middle school. It is truly getting old. Watching CNN is like watching The Real World.
"There is one job we can't afford on-the-job training for - our next President. That could be the costliest job training in history," - Clinton
"My understanding is she wasn't treasury secretary in the Clinton administration. I don't know exactly what experience she's claiming," - Obama
In all honesty it bothers me enough that our "top" candidates spend countless millions on the campaign trail in an attempt to get themselves recognized as the best for the job. If there is one quality I would like my candidate to have other than intelligence it would be humility, but the masses wont allow for humility so instead we get a one-upathon where each candidate is forced to make promises and attack there opponents credibility and integrity which in and of itself shows a lack of integrity and in my opinion credibility as well. Why do I need to watch a highly publicized and immature verbal battle between supposedly intelligent and reasonable adults.How have we allowed it to get this far. Personally I dont trust any of the candidates at all, if someone is willing to do that much in there own self-interest then they are already showing me qualities that make me uncomfortable. Add all that to the fact that the race for the presidency feels like a race to become Prom King/Queen on a much grander scale. I understand that quite obviously the president will be making some very serious decisions, but why then do they indulge in such a ridiculous public relations circus show where the sole intention is to look likeable on camera and "relate" to a certain demographic of people(<----also BS). Why do these future leaders of our country country constantly make hollow promises, preaching that they have the answers for every concievable important problem that we face. More importantly in this vein of thinking why do we allow the media to manipulate what is considered to be the"important" issues of the day. In my humble opinion an issue like gay marriage should be put on the backburner. As far as important issues go, the ethics of gay marriage pale in comparison to our reliance on foreign oil, and our willingness to forcibly access it, as well as our need for clean alternate energy. These are just a few among the countless other more pressing matters America has on its plate. For the love of god or whomever, please just give me a straight shooter, a realistic, no bullshit person whom isn't going to sugar coat me with garbage I can't believe.
Another thing that truly bothers me about our run for the presidency is why we end up with a mere two people to choose from in the eventual running of our country. Now I understand it starts off with a much larger berth of people, but how many of those people are limited, or more importantly limit themselves to a single party, a single mindset. How can I take a candidate serious if he isn't willing to change his ideas lest he be looked down upon by the members of his party or called a flip-flopper(or some such bs). Why don't other parties even get considered for the president? Why have we trapped ourselves in such a way that when two candidates from the same party come near the grand finale one must drop out or fear splitting the vote? Why do voters allow this to happen by labeling themselves a Democrat or a Republican, and therefore take away there own ability to open there minds to a potential different candidate.
Why is it that when the New York Times has a headline stating that Clinton's aids can't figure out how to discredit Obama, I am forced to see Hillary's campaign inadequacies on CNN and MSNBC the same night, further cementing an Obama win because the vast majority of people in our country will merely read a headline from a Television show or Newspaper roll with what is being said and feign actual knowledge? Why? How come? Why isn't? I feel like Curious George getting ready to sip on ether, something really needs to change for the better.
"There is one job we can't afford on-the-job training for - our next President. That could be the costliest job training in history," - Clinton
"My understanding is she wasn't treasury secretary in the Clinton administration. I don't know exactly what experience she's claiming," - Obama
In all honesty it bothers me enough that our "top" candidates spend countless millions on the campaign trail in an attempt to get themselves recognized as the best for the job. If there is one quality I would like my candidate to have other than intelligence it would be humility, but the masses wont allow for humility so instead we get a one-upathon where each candidate is forced to make promises and attack there opponents credibility and integrity which in and of itself shows a lack of integrity and in my opinion credibility as well. Why do I need to watch a highly publicized and immature verbal battle between supposedly intelligent and reasonable adults.How have we allowed it to get this far. Personally I dont trust any of the candidates at all, if someone is willing to do that much in there own self-interest then they are already showing me qualities that make me uncomfortable. Add all that to the fact that the race for the presidency feels like a race to become Prom King/Queen on a much grander scale. I understand that quite obviously the president will be making some very serious decisions, but why then do they indulge in such a ridiculous public relations circus show where the sole intention is to look likeable on camera and "relate" to a certain demographic of people(<----also BS). Why do these future leaders of our country country constantly make hollow promises, preaching that they have the answers for every concievable important problem that we face. More importantly in this vein of thinking why do we allow the media to manipulate what is considered to be the"important" issues of the day. In my humble opinion an issue like gay marriage should be put on the backburner. As far as important issues go, the ethics of gay marriage pale in comparison to our reliance on foreign oil, and our willingness to forcibly access it, as well as our need for clean alternate energy. These are just a few among the countless other more pressing matters America has on its plate. For the love of god or whomever, please just give me a straight shooter, a realistic, no bullshit person whom isn't going to sugar coat me with garbage I can't believe.
Another thing that truly bothers me about our run for the presidency is why we end up with a mere two people to choose from in the eventual running of our country. Now I understand it starts off with a much larger berth of people, but how many of those people are limited, or more importantly limit themselves to a single party, a single mindset. How can I take a candidate serious if he isn't willing to change his ideas lest he be looked down upon by the members of his party or called a flip-flopper(or some such bs). Why don't other parties even get considered for the president? Why have we trapped ourselves in such a way that when two candidates from the same party come near the grand finale one must drop out or fear splitting the vote? Why do voters allow this to happen by labeling themselves a Democrat or a Republican, and therefore take away there own ability to open there minds to a potential different candidate.
Why is it that when the New York Times has a headline stating that Clinton's aids can't figure out how to discredit Obama, I am forced to see Hillary's campaign inadequacies on CNN and MSNBC the same night, further cementing an Obama win because the vast majority of people in our country will merely read a headline from a Television show or Newspaper roll with what is being said and feign actual knowledge? Why? How come? Why isn't? I feel like Curious George getting ready to sip on ether, something really needs to change for the better.
Stoners Rejoice
I've really gone out of my way and done absolutely no research on this, but it does sound promising. So assuming you live to the average age people today live, which is 80 years your heart will beat roughly 3 billion times(thats one durable son of a B***h) in a lifetime. Now if you ask any doctor what you can do to strengthen your heart, 100 percent of them will tell you to excercise. Getting your heart moving and your body in shape has always been the best solution to staying healthy and will continue to be, but if you wish to be a lazy bastard there is a way. Considering the amount of people who constantly look for ways to change themsleves for the better without ever actually working for it, combined with the mounting support for legal marijuana i can only imagine this idea picking up steam and becoming the new "stay young forever" gimmick or whatever you want to call it. So here's the deal, it's very simple. Smoke lots of weed. Yes you heard me correctly. Oh, You already do you say? Well then fantastic keep improving your lifestyle and get your friends in on the act as well, it's for the better really. For those non-believers out there, how can something so unbelievably awesome like smoking green everyday better your life you ask? It's very simple, smoking increases your heart rate by 20 to 40 beats a minute which is exactly what working out does to help strengthen your heart. So intead of jumping on a treadmill or doing lame things like lifting heavy stuff(it's so tiring), all you have to do is get high a bunch and watch TV, where the heaviest thing you lift is a remote. See I told you it was simple, merely smoke and feel your heart strength grow exponentially. Be careful though this solution only increases lifespan through strengthening of the heart, it essentially does only half the job excercising will do, as it will not help you lose weight. That being said if you weren't going to hit the gym anyway you might as well blaze it up, right?
YOU WILL NOT LOSE WEIGHT USING THIS LIFESAVING PROCESS
Disclaimer: The side-effects of smoking everyday are extreme hunger, absence of memory, and loss of coordination as well as increasing stupidity. Also smoking may shorten an individuals lifespan significantly as you may get cancer and die. WARNING THIS MEDICAL SOLUTION IS UNTESTED AND UNAPPROVED AND SHOULD ONLY BE USED IF YOU HAVE NO DRIVE IN LIFE AND REALLY LIKE SMOKING MARIJUANA AND GETTING HIGH.
YOU WILL NOT LOSE WEIGHT USING THIS LIFESAVING PROCESS
Disclaimer: The side-effects of smoking everyday are extreme hunger, absence of memory, and loss of coordination as well as increasing stupidity. Also smoking may shorten an individuals lifespan significantly as you may get cancer and die. WARNING THIS MEDICAL SOLUTION IS UNTESTED AND UNAPPROVED AND SHOULD ONLY BE USED IF YOU HAVE NO DRIVE IN LIFE AND REALLY LIKE SMOKING MARIJUANA AND GETTING HIGH.
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